Don’t Smoke it, Toke it!
In 1919 law makers thought it a good idea to ban the sale of all alcohol and passed the Volstead Act despite then President Wilson vetoing it. Now all this ill-conceived law did was make a lot of unscrupulous people very rich. The bootleggers, smugglers and bathtub gin makers had a great time selling their hooch to anyone who would buy it. And that turned out to be a lot of people. It wasn’t until after the crash of the stock market that congress realized that they needed a few stiff drinks and repealed the eighteenth amendment in 1933.
In 1970 congress passed a Controlled Substances Act to prevent all those “hippies” from getting high. Opiates, cocaine, uppers, downers, marijuana, hashish and anything else they could think of made it to the list. I’m surprised that aspirin isn’t on it! Since then it’s been updated to prevent “potential abuse” of newer, better drugs that appear in ads in magazines and television programs. Gotta keep those baseball players from taking steroids (never mind the governor of California!) And conversely, created a huge drug cartel in Mexico. (And a very nasty one at that.) Thank you Richard Nixon.
Now it’s clear that the Obama administration is not going to waste its time, or its money on chasing down people dispensing medical marijuana. And with so much news about the Mexican mafia and all the violence that could easily spill over into our country, the issue of legalizing the growing, selling and smoking of the cannabis sativa plant may not be that far off.
My personal opinion on this point is that rather than it become a federal mandate, that it will be delegated to the states to decide if they want to legalize it or not. A state could simply pass a law saying that anyone over the age of 18 or 21 could buy marijuana, just like they can alcohol or cigarettes and tax the hell out of it. Or, they could be more judicious and make it legal by prescription from your doctor, or any doctor you can find who’ll write you a script for it. Now that poses a different issue. Drugs are generally not taxed, so it wouldn’t be to the state’s interest to allow them sold that way unless they charge a dispensing license, similar to a bar or liquor store needing a liquor license to sell booze.
In either case, the sale of grass would likely end up being sold by drug companies or tobacco companies. RJ Reynolds has everything it needs to grow, harvest, dry, package and dispense them. Marijuana is considerably easier to grow than tobacco, grows faster and needs almost no pesticides (ever seen a stoned caterpillar, not a pretty picture.) And no need to add all those nasty additives that make you addicted to it. It pretty much does that on its own.
But the best part is… this offers a great opportunity for the Madison Avenue folks to dream up a whole new advertising campaign that heretofore has never been thought of!
Holly Smoke!
Imagine what a creative session might be like if a large drug company was dispensing the marijuana.
(Ala Stan Freeburg)
A large conference room with market survey charts don the walls. A large white board hangs at the end of the room with “medical marijuana, what do we call it?” written across the top. Bright young creative types ponder it as they sip on their pricey bottled water de jour. The senior VP in charge of creative stands at the board tossing a marker in the air and catching it.
“Okay now, any ideas? Anyone?”
“Well Cid, the way I see it is we need something that’s going to appeal to our key demographic, which is, ah, baby boomers?” offers one creative type.
Cid, “Nope.”
“Men 18 to 35?” offers another
Cid, “Nope.”
“Seniors?” questions another.
Cid, “Nope.”
“Then who????” queries a forth.
Cid, “Everyone! Young, old, men, women it doesn’t matter. Oh sure, we have to target people with cancer and glaucoma, but everyone’s going to figure out a way to buy this stuff, you can count on that! So, what do we call it?”
“Ah, what about ‘Stonex’, the slogan could read ‘Stonex, when your life needs a better high’.”
Cid, “Alrighty, let’s keep them coming.”
“What if we called it ‘Cannibest’ the trusted name in weed.”
Cid, “Not sure about that one…”
“Okay, I’ve got it! ‘Melloodreemx’, we see a girl with long hair and a bandana around her forehead, dressed in a tie-dye mumu running through a field of marijuana in slow motion, stopping only to smell the buds on the plants, and the announcer says ‘Melloodreemx, when you need an occasional mood elevated’.”
Cid, “That’s great, when can you have it ready!”
And let’s not forget the disclaimer text. “Melloodreemx is not for everyone, consult your doctor before smoking this or any other stoner medication. Melloodreemx should not be used if you are taking any other hallucinogenics. Side effects may include, raised libido, a serious case of the munchies and general sense of euphoria. If symptoms persist, take a nap.”
Far out, man!
In 1919 law makers thought it a good idea to ban the sale of all alcohol and passed the Volstead Act despite then President Wilson vetoing it. Now all this ill-conceived law did was make a lot of unscrupulous people very rich. The bootleggers, smugglers and bathtub gin makers had a great time selling their hooch to anyone who would buy it. And that turned out to be a lot of people. It wasn’t until after the crash of the stock market that congress realized that they needed a few stiff drinks and repealed the eighteenth amendment in 1933.
In 1970 congress passed a Controlled Substances Act to prevent all those “hippies” from getting high. Opiates, cocaine, uppers, downers, marijuana, hashish and anything else they could think of made it to the list. I’m surprised that aspirin isn’t on it! Since then it’s been updated to prevent “potential abuse” of newer, better drugs that appear in ads in magazines and television programs. Gotta keep those baseball players from taking steroids (never mind the governor of California!) And conversely, created a huge drug cartel in Mexico. (And a very nasty one at that.) Thank you Richard Nixon.
Now it’s clear that the Obama administration is not going to waste its time, or its money on chasing down people dispensing medical marijuana. And with so much news about the Mexican mafia and all the violence that could easily spill over into our country, the issue of legalizing the growing, selling and smoking of the cannabis sativa plant may not be that far off.
My personal opinion on this point is that rather than it become a federal mandate, that it will be delegated to the states to decide if they want to legalize it or not. A state could simply pass a law saying that anyone over the age of 18 or 21 could buy marijuana, just like they can alcohol or cigarettes and tax the hell out of it. Or, they could be more judicious and make it legal by prescription from your doctor, or any doctor you can find who’ll write you a script for it. Now that poses a different issue. Drugs are generally not taxed, so it wouldn’t be to the state’s interest to allow them sold that way unless they charge a dispensing license, similar to a bar or liquor store needing a liquor license to sell booze.
In either case, the sale of grass would likely end up being sold by drug companies or tobacco companies. RJ Reynolds has everything it needs to grow, harvest, dry, package and dispense them. Marijuana is considerably easier to grow than tobacco, grows faster and needs almost no pesticides (ever seen a stoned caterpillar, not a pretty picture.) And no need to add all those nasty additives that make you addicted to it. It pretty much does that on its own.
But the best part is… this offers a great opportunity for the Madison Avenue folks to dream up a whole new advertising campaign that heretofore has never been thought of!
Holly Smoke!
Imagine what a creative session might be like if a large drug company was dispensing the marijuana.
(Ala Stan Freeburg)
A large conference room with market survey charts don the walls. A large white board hangs at the end of the room with “medical marijuana, what do we call it?” written across the top. Bright young creative types ponder it as they sip on their pricey bottled water de jour. The senior VP in charge of creative stands at the board tossing a marker in the air and catching it.
“Okay now, any ideas? Anyone?”
“Well Cid, the way I see it is we need something that’s going to appeal to our key demographic, which is, ah, baby boomers?” offers one creative type.
Cid, “Nope.”
“Men 18 to 35?” offers another
Cid, “Nope.”
“Seniors?” questions another.
Cid, “Nope.”
“Then who????” queries a forth.
Cid, “Everyone! Young, old, men, women it doesn’t matter. Oh sure, we have to target people with cancer and glaucoma, but everyone’s going to figure out a way to buy this stuff, you can count on that! So, what do we call it?”
“Ah, what about ‘Stonex’, the slogan could read ‘Stonex, when your life needs a better high’.”
Cid, “Alrighty, let’s keep them coming.”
“What if we called it ‘Cannibest’ the trusted name in weed.”
Cid, “Not sure about that one…”
“Okay, I’ve got it! ‘Melloodreemx’, we see a girl with long hair and a bandana around her forehead, dressed in a tie-dye mumu running through a field of marijuana in slow motion, stopping only to smell the buds on the plants, and the announcer says ‘Melloodreemx, when you need an occasional mood elevated’.”
Cid, “That’s great, when can you have it ready!”
And let’s not forget the disclaimer text. “Melloodreemx is not for everyone, consult your doctor before smoking this or any other stoner medication. Melloodreemx should not be used if you are taking any other hallucinogenics. Side effects may include, raised libido, a serious case of the munchies and general sense of euphoria. If symptoms persist, take a nap.”
Far out, man!
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